Every morning

This is how I begin most of my mornings.

Almost every morning, I am distracted from my sleep by the parallel sunbeams which shine through the shutters of my bedroom. With a slight squint, I take a peak and look at the morning star to warm my eyes. I can feel the sunrays melt in shades of comforting yellow within my heavy-eyes. The inner voices of my head are still not awake so I quickly fluff my pillow with weary hands, flip myself to a more comfortable position and continue to curl under layers of goose-feathers. Still, it feels a little cold, so I hug myself between six other pillows and create a little cuddly protective fold. With a slight smile and sealed eyes, I wish for one more moment of peaceful silence. But it’s true; you can never have everything you wish for. Moments after my consciousness begins to tap in, my auditory senses are also awakened by the sound of sirens from my cruel fuzzy alarm. With a clumsy hand, I almost drop everything on my side table as I try to switch the alarm off. “اصبحنا واصبح الملك لله - We have reached the morning and at this very time all sovereignty belongs to Allah”, I mumble my first words of the day. Slowly as I stretch my arms and legs, I indulge in the feeling of a blood flood streaming from my head to toes. That’s when I know for a fact that I have spent my night curled like a little shrimp. In my mind, I wonder how my loved ones are. I begin to think to myself, “is my mother walking through our garden picking flowers and whispering her morning prayers? … Is father comfortably seated in his office sipping his tea and reading today’s newspaper? How are my brothers? What are cousins doing now? How are my friends….did she get the dress she wanted? Did he get to uni. on time? Have they decided whether it’s Paris or Rome we’re going to on Christmas? Oh well….i guess I’ll find out sometime soon”. Suddenly, the chain of my thoughts is disturbed by the voices of my friends as they chatter on as they pass my room to make their way to the kitchen. That is obviously when my taste-buds are awakened by pops of fresh toast from the toaster and the strong scent of cinnamon latte. It’s now definite . . . I cannot go back to sleep. Especially now that I have breakfast planned firstly in my mental agenda followed by a hectic list of must do’s for the rest of my day. I just cannot make a quick spring out of bed....come to think of it, if people were meant to pop out of bed, we'd all sleep in toasters! Anyhow..so I drag myself out of bed, stable my feet on the floor and make my way to the bathroom. In my heart though, I’m secretly wishing for a good day wishing for a louder laughter, a tighter friendly-hug, a gentler form of tenderness and self-satisfaction derived from self-love. I am wishing for more delightful surprises and in general…for an eventful yet productive day.

I hope i never have to wake up plunged to a psychological shock, i hope with every morning I am blessed with a good day, a new lucky sway and a peacefull way to a world that has become a source of human fray… memi~

Dear God Forgive me when I whine!

Yesterday on my way to the library, I saw a taxi man trying to help a handicap person in a wheelchair get into the car. It was difficult… for them, and us; the passer by’s! Seeing them both struggle mutely, keeping the patience with a slight smile to make it seem normal was unbearable. I sat a short distance away and observed how people reacted.

Some walked hurriedly with a rigid facial expression trying to look busy and unaware of the situation, some were affected by it, others were trying to continue a conversation after muttering for a few moments; having seen the young lady in her wheelchair being pulled back and forth into the car to fit in a comfortable position. I placed my hand on my heart, and thought to myself, what a devoted person this young lady is!

To wake up every morning and go through the same hassle and trouble to get to university must be difficult! But I’m also certain that her will is stronger than any of the people around her, including mine!

I began to question myself, whether I would be able to do the same if I was under severely difficult conditions. Will I be able to leave my house very often and go to university, graduate, and look for a job? Will I have high hopes and get married some day and have my own babies? It’s all perfectly possible, but the question is….will I be able to have the optimism, the strength, the determination and the motivation to do all the things I would want to do?

Sometimes I whine about having a blister on the soles of my feet for having worn a pair of heels the night before and decide to sabotage my plans for the evening thinking about the pain I’ll be going through if I walked ten more steps! (silly me) .. I need some cognitive therapy; I should start changing my thinking process, that way my behaviour will change eventually. Come to think of it, I think ill add this to my New Year resolution list of ‘Must Do’s’!

To be frank, I forgot what last year’s resolution was, but I do know one thing; that I am definitely not the same person I was last year, which is always a PLUS…I hope!

I was trying to find reasons as to why people whine. I began to brainstorm in my mind. I imagined a whining person in the middle, with lots of arrows stretching out.. each arrow had a reason as to why that person whines. It’s difficult to explain in details, but I came to a very short thesis which states, that perhaps a person whines because it’s another way of expressing his/her worries. Or perhaps some people are not used to the common peace between the voices in their head, and hence begin to whine about something completely worthless in order to have something to focus on other than the silence in his/her head… or maybe by whining is just another anxiety mechanism, by which; one focuses on the topic they are whining about to avoid an interpersonal anxiety provoking subject, event, or situation.

If whining is derived from always wanting something, then where does the need to always have something fulfilled come from? Could it be from our Id? and if we whine a lot, does that also mean that we have a week superego; to step on our childish Id and use it’s moral powers to make us more reasonable, sensible, and satisfied beings?

I’ll leave this discussion open… you are welcome to share your views…

the wonders of a smile :)

Helllllllllllllllllllllleeeeeeeewwwww my good friends..

How are weeee todayyyhh? ;)

Pretty fine I hope!

Well, lets see…Today was fairly a good day for me. Did loads of studying, then went out for a long walk to get some books, then met a few friends for dinner, and then went for a walk with one of them.

The best part of my day however, is the number of times strangers smiled to me today! It was a beautiful feeling. I used to walk with a slight smile on my face wherever I go. It was simply my trademark . . . hell I was voted nicest smile in high school too! But today was different. Today I did not really pull a smile on my face, I was in a hurry and had to finish quiet a lot of things before meeting my friends, and yes I try to be as punctual as possible, so I had loads going on in my head.

To my surprise though, as I was walking down the street, I noticed that people, strangers to be more specific, were smiling to me, and one actually passed by, turned around and smiled. For a moment I was worried that something was wrong with me :P hahah I tried to look at my reflection on a glass window and there was nothing wrong really lol! Anyhow so then I thought, I should take this positively and think of it this way, “today is a good day to many people, and because they are happy they smile to everyone, or maybe they just like me :P ahahahahahahah”.

Yeah whatever :P lol …

So precisely, my point here is that it would be a shame to hide your smile really, no matter how it looked like, a smile is a smile. And personally, I have theory, which is that smiles are contagious! I’m sure you’ve heard it before :P but its true. I really think they are contagious in a hidden manner, they just slide into your subconscious and draw a smile on you’re little pretty face.

Aahhh, I think I’ll call it a night and set off to bed sometime soon, so I will leave you with some quotes on smiling ;)

Wish you well… wish you pretty smiles and a wonderful day tomorrow!

here is a little flower to everyone..... buhhbbyeeee *waves a little bye bye*

Everyone smiles in the same language. ~Author Unknown

Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day~

People seldom notice old clothes if you wear a big smile. ~Lee Mildon

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight. ~Phyllis Diller

Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available. ~Jim Beggs

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. ~Mark Twain, Following the Equator ( okay I hope I maintain that positive outlook 30 years from today when I have a couple of wrinkles here and there! Lol)

A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're at home. ~Author Unknown

If you don't have a smile, I'll give you one of mine. ~Author Unknown

A laugh is a smile that bursts. ~Mary H. Waldrip

Beauty is power; a smile is its sword. ~Charles ReadeA

smile is the universal welcome. ~Max Eastman

Keep smiling - it makes people wonder what you've been up to. ~Author UnknownY

ou're never fully dressed without a smile. ~Martin Charnin


It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown. ~Author Unknown

simply sunday!

Time: 12:14 am
Day: Monday
Setting: study area in my cosy floral room
Listening to: The reason - Hobastank

Well well well . . .
If it isn’t my very first entry!
This was certainly not jolted down on my busy agenda for today!
It came across as a completely unplanned surprise.
A friend of mine gave me the link of his blog to skim through, and so it became a spur of a moment decision- I wanted to create my very own blog too!

At this moment, I feel completely and utterly drained!
It’s Sunday . . . it should be a day where people just relax, spend some time with close friends or relatives, junk out watching a classic movie like Oliver twist or Mary Poppins and just lay there in their comfy pyjamas on a pleasantly comfy couch.

Instead however, I had to go to photocopy papers, then meet my PD (Personal Development) group for an hour, then quickly meet some other friends for supper (or in my case f6oor), and then go out again to print some other papers and finally reach home to do some more work {yaaaaaaaaaaay} ^-^

(sense the sarcasm please!)

Here is a little shot of how my desk looks at the moment.. I need your pity lol :P

Anyhow, Perhaps I should get used to this hectic life after all. Could this be a sign of 2007 coming in? things begin to speed, time fades away, you have more on your shoulders than you’ve planned to carry, and you use less words to express your feelings than your frequent silent sighs.. Oh well, you can never really tell.

Generally, however, I learned one thing today . . . to ask other people’s opinions much more often. . .it tends to help you in the long run, if you carefully listen to what they say of course.